Is this typical? You are a month behind on your rent and your credit cards are maxed out. Your boss wants more results, your twelve-year-old wants to leave home and your Dad won’t stop telling you that you married an idiot.
And you have a migraine.
How can you feel better? These tips might help …
The books say, “Raise your self-esteem!” But here’s the problem: we try to raise our self-esteem by comparing ourselves with other people. We tell ourselves …
• “I’m okay because I’m thinner than her.”
• “I’m okay because I got a promotion, won a trophy, drive an Audi.”
But there will always be people who are richer, trendier or cleverer than you are – so you never win.
Instead, aim to be a better you. Set goals to be happier, healthier or more skilled. Refuse to compare yourself.
You have your own journey. Life doesn’t have to be a competition.
Make a TO DO list each day. PRIORITIZE your list.
When you fix what MATTERS MOST every day, you feel better every day.
A walk in a park restores you in ways that stinky pubs and shopping malls and bad TV never can. Visit a beach or sit on a lake. Grow tomatoes on your windowsill. You’ll think better thoughts. There’s nothing to figure out, it just happens.
Trying to change other people is too stressful! Whenever you try to force people to be happy, healthy, motivated, spiritual or intelligent, you get frustrated and they hate you!
EXAMPLE: Mary marries Fred. Mary says, “Now if I can just make him quit smoking, quit drinking and quit thumping traffic cops, I’ll be happy.” It doesn’t work.
You say, “But it’s painful to watch other people being stupid!” Right! But when you force them to change, they don’t learn and they don't change. (Parents and policemen sometimes need to force people! Most other times, we best let others make their own mistakes.)
And what is the absolute number one tip for more peace of mind?
So your life isn’t perfect. You have colleagues who do less than they could, a husband who does less than he should and children who could be more considerate.
You say, “How can I be grateful?”
Try this. As you go to sleep each night, find ONE more thing to be grateful for. You’ll enjoy greater peace of mind.
Why? Because YOU CAN'T BE GRATEFUL AND STRESSED AT THE SAME TIME.
HAPPY people focus on what they HAVE.
UNHAPPY people focus on what’s MISSING.
Andrew Matthews is an international speaker on “attitude” and “being happy”. Over 1 million people have attended Andrew’s presentations on 5 continents.
Andrew’s talent is in making complex issues simple, and he relates to CEO’s, middle management and high school students with equal ease. He entertains while providing audiences with the tools and inspiration to live happier lives.
Andrew’s presentations are laced with humour and he draws lightning-fast cartoons as he speaks! Read More